It Doesn't Count (Nebtho One-shot)
Wednesday, August 6th, 2014 11:12 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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mindcrackloveI have returned from the dark place known as Writers Block with another one-shot! There's some violence and blood and character death is mentioned, but they respawn so... nothing too bad. Thought I'd give a warning just in case.
After reading olivia's post yesterday, it had me feeling a little guilty. Quality really does mean a lot, and I am very sorry if my previous writings didn't meet this site's standards. I currently don't have a beta, so sometimes I miss errors I make, but I have read through this one many times to make sure it is worthy of being posted. Again, I'm very sorry for any problems I may have caused, I will try my hardest to improve my writing and make sure it is good quality.
I hope you enjoy the story. (It's around 1,200 words)
“It’s impossible!” Nebris groaned, frustrated and tired.
Despite Nebris’s frequent training and mastery of brewing, defeating Etho seemed just as unreachable as it had in the beginning. Nebris sat on the ground in spawn. His fingers dug into the moist, green grass as Etho stood over him holding all of Nebris’s items. He handed Nebris his bow and Nebris grabbed it, avoiding Etho’s gaze.
Etho said nothing, there was nothing he could think to say. His arms were crossed and his head was tilted to one side. Nebris couldn’t stand it, there was no way he would let Etho think he was inferior. He had to prove that he was just as strong, not weak like Etho must have thought. However, a small thought in the back of Nebris’s mind prodded him.
Nebris plucked at the bowstring with his fingers, something he did when deep in thought. Was there really a point in trying anymore? He would never win, and his hard work seemed as if it was for nothing. Nebris clenched his jaw and ground his teeth together; the pain mixed with his frustration as he sat there with Etho staring down at him. Etho hesitated briefly before offering a hand to help Nebris up.
Nebris ignored his offer and got up on his own. He stared down at his socks and balled his hands into tight fists. He didn’t want to feel so angry towards Etho, but he couldn’t help it. Etho didn’t know what it was like to always lose, or what it was like for hours of training to take him nowhere. Nebris’s fingernails dug into his palms, he just needed some time away from everything.
“I should go.”
“Nebris-” Etho reached out to grab his shoulder, but Nebris brushed it off and started walking away. “Forget it,” Nebris grumbled.
As Nebris walked away, his grip tightened around his bow. He twisted his hands, causing the bow to make a satisfying sound as the wood splintered and the bowstring snapped. As Nebris stepped into the Nether Portal, he dropped the broken bow on the ground, leaving it to sit there as he headed back to his base to be alone.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Etho stood over the anvil and wiped sweat off his forehead. The cracks on the anvil’s surface stood as proof that Etho had spent many levels and hours working. He picked up Nebris’s bow and ran a hand down the smooth wood. The splinters were sanded down to perfection and the broken bowstring had been replaced with a stronger one. Etho ran a finger over the carved text that read “Bow of Justice.” The bow glowed a subtle purple color as Etho held it up to the light so he could admire the finished product. After grinding levels to enchant books, the bow had been upgraded to even better enchants than it had before. He checked his notes one last time before tossing the crumpled paper in the trash: Power V, Flame I, Unbreaking III, Punch I. It wasn’t perfect, considering it lacked Infinity and it could have a higher level Punch, but Etho was sure Nebris would like it.
Etho slipped into the portal and waited as his vision blurred and smears of purple swirled around him. He hoped Nebris was okay, he never had gotten that angry before. He made his way through the nether tunnel and stepped into the final portal leading to Nebris’s place. As Etho stepped out of the portal, he collided face-first with Nebris. The diamond helmet Nebris was wearing made the impact especially painful. Both of them fell to the ground, groaning in pain.
“Ow!” Nebris attempted to stand up, but just fell back down again.
“Sorry,” Etho said quietly. He could feel blood trickling down from his nose and wiped it away with his shirt sleeve. Nose bleeds weren’t anything new, but they were still annoying to deal with.
“Here,” Nebris sighed as he dug around in his inventory to grab a cloth for Etho.
"Thanks."
Etho stood up and held the cloth to his nose, the absorbed blood made it warm and moist. He offered Nebris a hand and this time he took it, grasping Etho’s hand as Etho shifted his weight to help Nebris up. Nebris’s face seemed to smudge various shades of pink, but Etho ignored it. It was probably his imagination.
“I was about to leave to go look for you,” Nebris admitted.
Nebris noticed the bow laying on the ground and bent down to pick it up. He unknowingly tried handing it back to Etho, who shook his head.
“It’s yours,” Etho stated as Nebris’s eyes widened. “I fixed it for you.”
“Seriously?” Nebris pulled back an arrow to test it out.
“Yeah. Anything for you,” Etho was glad that Nebris liked it... until an arrow plunged straight into Etho’s left forearm, knocking him back against the wall. He yelped out in pain and grabbed the arrow, pulling it out as blood stained his shirt. Etho doubled over, stabilizing himself by placing his hands on his knees.
“Nebris!? Really? I-” Etho’s sentence was cut off as Nebris swiftly pressed his sword blade against Etho’s neck. Nebris grinned victoriously, which caused Etho to roll his eyes.
“It doesn’t count as a win if you cheat.”
“And how is this cheating?” Nebris applied more pressure to the blade, causing Etho to cringe.
“I’m weaponless and not wearing armor,” Etho knew that wasn't enough to convince Nebris to stop, if there was an opportunity Nebris would always take it. He had something somewhat desperate in mind, and he hoped it would work.
“It counts as a win in my book. All I have to do is finish you off.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nebris scratched his beard, going over the different ways to finish the fight. Quick and painless? No, that was too… well, nice. Etho stared at him, sweat trickled down his flushed face. His eyes were dull, yet oddly confident. What was Etho plotting? Before Nebris had a chance to consider the matter further, Etho leaned in and pressed his lips against Nebris’s. Etho’s mask was still on, causing the fabric to rub against Nebris’s face. The faint scent of blood from Etho’s nosebleed reached Nebris. Nebris pushed back into the kiss and ran a hand along Etho’s injured arm. The ninja cringed from the pain, but they stayed together, sharing the small space between them. A small sigh escaped from Etho, causing Nebris to snap out of it.
Nebris pulled away and squinted at Etho, repositioning the blade against his neck again. He chuckled and shook his head. Etho remained silent, his hastily made plan had failed.
“Sly bastard.”
Nebris slit his rival’s throat and watched as Etho’s body slid down to the floor and faded. He didn’t drop anything, meaning his inventory was completely empty. Nebris laughed, Etho knew what he was in for when he decided to visit. He quickly made his way back to spawn to meet Etho, who was already on his feet waiting. Etho moved in close to Nebris so he was inches away and pulled down his mask, causing Nebris to shudder in anticipation. Instead of kissing him, however, Etho softly whispered in his ear.
“I told you already, it doesn't count."
If you have any constructive criticism, I would be more than happy to know what you think :)
After reading olivia's post yesterday, it had me feeling a little guilty. Quality really does mean a lot, and I am very sorry if my previous writings didn't meet this site's standards. I currently don't have a beta, so sometimes I miss errors I make, but I have read through this one many times to make sure it is worthy of being posted. Again, I'm very sorry for any problems I may have caused, I will try my hardest to improve my writing and make sure it is good quality.
I hope you enjoy the story. (It's around 1,200 words)
“It’s impossible!” Nebris groaned, frustrated and tired.
Despite Nebris’s frequent training and mastery of brewing, defeating Etho seemed just as unreachable as it had in the beginning. Nebris sat on the ground in spawn. His fingers dug into the moist, green grass as Etho stood over him holding all of Nebris’s items. He handed Nebris his bow and Nebris grabbed it, avoiding Etho’s gaze.
Etho said nothing, there was nothing he could think to say. His arms were crossed and his head was tilted to one side. Nebris couldn’t stand it, there was no way he would let Etho think he was inferior. He had to prove that he was just as strong, not weak like Etho must have thought. However, a small thought in the back of Nebris’s mind prodded him.
Nebris plucked at the bowstring with his fingers, something he did when deep in thought. Was there really a point in trying anymore? He would never win, and his hard work seemed as if it was for nothing. Nebris clenched his jaw and ground his teeth together; the pain mixed with his frustration as he sat there with Etho staring down at him. Etho hesitated briefly before offering a hand to help Nebris up.
Nebris ignored his offer and got up on his own. He stared down at his socks and balled his hands into tight fists. He didn’t want to feel so angry towards Etho, but he couldn’t help it. Etho didn’t know what it was like to always lose, or what it was like for hours of training to take him nowhere. Nebris’s fingernails dug into his palms, he just needed some time away from everything.
“I should go.”
“Nebris-” Etho reached out to grab his shoulder, but Nebris brushed it off and started walking away. “Forget it,” Nebris grumbled.
As Nebris walked away, his grip tightened around his bow. He twisted his hands, causing the bow to make a satisfying sound as the wood splintered and the bowstring snapped. As Nebris stepped into the Nether Portal, he dropped the broken bow on the ground, leaving it to sit there as he headed back to his base to be alone.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Etho stood over the anvil and wiped sweat off his forehead. The cracks on the anvil’s surface stood as proof that Etho had spent many levels and hours working. He picked up Nebris’s bow and ran a hand down the smooth wood. The splinters were sanded down to perfection and the broken bowstring had been replaced with a stronger one. Etho ran a finger over the carved text that read “Bow of Justice.” The bow glowed a subtle purple color as Etho held it up to the light so he could admire the finished product. After grinding levels to enchant books, the bow had been upgraded to even better enchants than it had before. He checked his notes one last time before tossing the crumpled paper in the trash: Power V, Flame I, Unbreaking III, Punch I. It wasn’t perfect, considering it lacked Infinity and it could have a higher level Punch, but Etho was sure Nebris would like it.
Etho slipped into the portal and waited as his vision blurred and smears of purple swirled around him. He hoped Nebris was okay, he never had gotten that angry before. He made his way through the nether tunnel and stepped into the final portal leading to Nebris’s place. As Etho stepped out of the portal, he collided face-first with Nebris. The diamond helmet Nebris was wearing made the impact especially painful. Both of them fell to the ground, groaning in pain.
“Ow!” Nebris attempted to stand up, but just fell back down again.
“Sorry,” Etho said quietly. He could feel blood trickling down from his nose and wiped it away with his shirt sleeve. Nose bleeds weren’t anything new, but they were still annoying to deal with.
“Here,” Nebris sighed as he dug around in his inventory to grab a cloth for Etho.
"Thanks."
Etho stood up and held the cloth to his nose, the absorbed blood made it warm and moist. He offered Nebris a hand and this time he took it, grasping Etho’s hand as Etho shifted his weight to help Nebris up. Nebris’s face seemed to smudge various shades of pink, but Etho ignored it. It was probably his imagination.
“I was about to leave to go look for you,” Nebris admitted.
Nebris noticed the bow laying on the ground and bent down to pick it up. He unknowingly tried handing it back to Etho, who shook his head.
“It’s yours,” Etho stated as Nebris’s eyes widened. “I fixed it for you.”
“Seriously?” Nebris pulled back an arrow to test it out.
“Yeah. Anything for you,” Etho was glad that Nebris liked it... until an arrow plunged straight into Etho’s left forearm, knocking him back against the wall. He yelped out in pain and grabbed the arrow, pulling it out as blood stained his shirt. Etho doubled over, stabilizing himself by placing his hands on his knees.
“Nebris!? Really? I-” Etho’s sentence was cut off as Nebris swiftly pressed his sword blade against Etho’s neck. Nebris grinned victoriously, which caused Etho to roll his eyes.
“It doesn’t count as a win if you cheat.”
“And how is this cheating?” Nebris applied more pressure to the blade, causing Etho to cringe.
“I’m weaponless and not wearing armor,” Etho knew that wasn't enough to convince Nebris to stop, if there was an opportunity Nebris would always take it. He had something somewhat desperate in mind, and he hoped it would work.
“It counts as a win in my book. All I have to do is finish you off.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Nebris scratched his beard, going over the different ways to finish the fight. Quick and painless? No, that was too… well, nice. Etho stared at him, sweat trickled down his flushed face. His eyes were dull, yet oddly confident. What was Etho plotting? Before Nebris had a chance to consider the matter further, Etho leaned in and pressed his lips against Nebris’s. Etho’s mask was still on, causing the fabric to rub against Nebris’s face. The faint scent of blood from Etho’s nosebleed reached Nebris. Nebris pushed back into the kiss and ran a hand along Etho’s injured arm. The ninja cringed from the pain, but they stayed together, sharing the small space between them. A small sigh escaped from Etho, causing Nebris to snap out of it.
Nebris pulled away and squinted at Etho, repositioning the blade against his neck again. He chuckled and shook his head. Etho remained silent, his hastily made plan had failed.
“Sly bastard.”
Nebris slit his rival’s throat and watched as Etho’s body slid down to the floor and faded. He didn’t drop anything, meaning his inventory was completely empty. Nebris laughed, Etho knew what he was in for when he decided to visit. He quickly made his way back to spawn to meet Etho, who was already on his feet waiting. Etho moved in close to Nebris so he was inches away and pulled down his mask, causing Nebris to shudder in anticipation. Instead of kissing him, however, Etho softly whispered in his ear.
“I told you already, it doesn't count."
If you have any constructive criticism, I would be more than happy to know what you think :)
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Date: Wednesday, August 6th, 2014 05:22 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: Thursday, August 7th, 2014 10:16 pm (UTC)This was Eclipse btw
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Date: Wednesday, August 6th, 2014 06:24 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: Wednesday, August 6th, 2014 08:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Wednesday, August 6th, 2014 09:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Wednesday, August 6th, 2014 09:46 pm (UTC)Maybe it's just the satisfaction of tearing people's hearts apart. I know that's how I feel when I read really good Nebtho stories. And then I proceed to go watch Etho's and Nebris' videos to confirm they are still alive. (I'm just paranoid and silly really)
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Date: Wednesday, August 6th, 2014 09:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Wednesday, August 6th, 2014 08:16 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: Wednesday, August 6th, 2014 11:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Thursday, August 7th, 2014 12:17 am (UTC)no subject
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Date: Thursday, August 7th, 2014 01:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: Friday, August 8th, 2014 12:02 am (UTC)Also, as far as I can see, this does not contain any major errors.... Then again I was reading it, not betaing it, so I may have missed something... But good job.
no subject
Date: Friday, August 8th, 2014 01:53 am (UTC)no subject
Date: Friday, August 8th, 2014 02:21 am (UTC)no subject
Date: Friday, August 8th, 2014 03:08 am (UTC)What have I done...
*proceeds to hide body under a rug*
no subject
Date: Friday, August 8th, 2014 04:19 am (UTC)*Decides to troll you*
*stands up*
BRRRAAAAAAIIIINNNSSSS.....
no subject
Date: Friday, August 8th, 2014 03:44 pm (UTC)*fails*
*dies*
you win :P
no subject
Date: Friday, August 8th, 2014 03:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Friday, August 8th, 2014 08:20 pm (UTC)