Nightmares (Fic)

[theropod]

This was supposed to be fairly short but then it ended up at six pages...

Sequel to Alone in the Dark

Fanart by the lovely kissingpigmen. Spoilers for the fic!


-0-

 

Kurt was healing, slowly. The burns were losing their angry red, becoming a more faded pink colour the longer he spent soaking in baths of that pink potion Zisteau used on his bandages before. The red never quite faded from his left eye despite that, but his eyesight didn't seem to suffer. The hair he'd lost to the same explosion which had burned him was also beginning to grow back, thankfully. The weakness in his limbs faded and he felt well enough over time to explore the Lens and the lands around the floating fortress. Zisteau was always there, either by his side or as a shadow watching over him from a short distance away. Kurt found he couldn't bring himself to care, the fear of being alone always in the back of his mind now.

 

Some days they barely spoke a word to each other, Zisteau respectfully being just a shadow when Kurt needed time alone. Yet, at other times they were almost glued to each other, chatting as Kurt helped Zisteau lay some redstone wiring or plan out a new design for something in the future. When he was with the pigman, Kurt found it easy to forget the chill that always seemed to be in his bones, forget the fear and forget the pain of not only his wounds but the betrayal of a close friend.

 

Likewise, when Zisteau found the quiet human sitting near him or tentatively striking up a conversation, it was easy to forget the anger in his heart. It was more than simple anger however, directed not only at the B-Team but at himself for allowing this all to happen and it returned all too easily in the dead of night when he lay in his bed trying to sleep.

 

He wasn't the only one having issues resting.

 

-0-

 

Kurt nodded a goodnight to Zisteau, slipping away into the room he'd been given during his stay here. It was still mostly bare, just a bed, chair, table and chest but Zisteau had tried to make it more like home for him, setting up a photograph on the wall of Kurt and his old tamed wolf. He'd appreciated the gesture but it hadn't mattered much. Still, once he changed into his flannel pyjamas (again, a gift from Zisteau and by god they were comfy) and slid into his bed, there was little else to do than stare at the ceiling or the picture.

 

He didn't want to sleep. Sleeping only made him remember what he didn't want to, fill his dreams with that lonely cave. Traitors and monsters, a chill so deep in his bones he couldn't get rid of it even while awake. Every time he'd jerk awake with a soft cry, the sound of an Enderman's scream in his ears. It was the rare dream where he awoke with the sound of Zisteau's scream of agony resounding in his mind that sent him out of the bed and through to peek in at Zisteau in his own bed, just making sure he was still alive, still in one piece. He'd stare a little, just making sure the pigman was still breathing before retreating to his bed, staring at the ceiling in silence until dawn broke. It was impossible to really sleep for more than a few hours without a nightmare ruining it so why even bother?

 

It was one such dream that plagued him that night. He awoke in a sweat, shaking a little with what he'd seen in the dream. Before he was really fully awake, his feet were carrying him out of the bed and through the dimly lit Lens to Zisteau's room. He knew the way well even in the dark by this point, easily avoiding the hole in the centre and the pressure plates until he stopped by the bedroom door. Kurt peeked in the doorway, expecting to see Zisteau resting in the bed.

 

It was quite the opposite. The lamps were on, Zisteau sitting at his desk and poring over what looked like maps and charts. Kurt froze in the doorway when Zisteau looked up. “...Kurt? I thought you were asleep.”

 

“...Couldn't sleep.” Kurt admitted quietly, leaning into the door frame, staring at the sandstone there instead of the pigman. “Not disturbing you am I?”

 

“No, I uh, I couldn't sleep either actually.” Zisteau leaned back in his seat and studied Kurt for a moment. “You okay?” he asked gently, sensing something was off.

 

Kurt stood in an uncomfortable silence for a moment, swallowing thickly as he considered his answer. “I...I keep having nightmares about the cave.”

 

Zisteau gestured to the seat beside him. “You wanna talk?” he asked, offering to listen and to help his friend in any way he could.

 

The explorer hesitated before stepping over the threshold and sitting himself down in the seat. “Thanks...”

 

“Coffee?”

 

Kurt raised an eyebrow. “At this time of night?”

 

“It's not like either of us are sleeping any time soon.” Zisteau shrugged.

 

“Mm, good point.” he nodded. “Please.”

 

Zisteau rose and flipped on the coffee machine in the corner of the room, preparing two cups for them. He glanced back at Kurt, feeling the need to fill the sudden silence with something. “You should come with me tomorrow, I'm gonna take down a few trees, it's getting a bit woody down there. The sun will do you good.”

 

“Won't I just get in your way?”

 

“Na, you can lie on the hill or something, just be a sun worshipper for the day.” He shot Kurt a grin when he heard a soft snort come from him. It was so rare now to hear any laughter from him, even that small noise felt like a huge triumph. Coffee done, he set the mug in front of Kurt and reclaimed his seat, own mug in hand. He didn't miss how the little smile dropped away at the prospect of talking about the nightmares. “Hey.”

 

Kurt looked up.

 

“We don't have to talk if you don't want to.” Zisteau had no desire to pressure him into anything, especially not when it bothered him so.

 

“Talking's supposed to help.” Kurt half shrugged. “What good is bottling it up going to do me?”

 

“You sound like you're trying to convince yourself.”

 

“Maybe I am.” Kurt dropped his gaze to the black liquid in his cup, watching it for a long moment as he gathered his thoughts. How was he supposed to explain this?

 

“Start at the beginning?” Zisteau suggested when he saw the issues Kurt was having.

 

Kurt took in a deep breath. “I...I'm in the cave. Sometimes that's all and it's not so bad but...sometimes there's others. Bdubs...Genny...the Enderman. Sometimes you're there.” He raised his eyes to Zisteau's, seeing more concern there than he really would have thought possible. “But it never ends well if you are.”

 

“Why?”

 

“The Enderman always wins.”

 

Zisteau's hand twitched against his mug, resisting the urge to reach out and comfort Kurt with some kind of physical touch. He doubted it would go down well however. “But it didn't.” he said softly. “We made it out of there together, and we're here now. You're safe.”

 

“What if I wake up one day and I'm back in that cave?” Kurt asked bluntly. “What if this is the dream and that's where I still am?”

 

“Then I'd come for you again.” He said firmly. “I wouldn't leave you down there, not for all the emeralds and lava in the world.”

 

Kurt stared down into his coffee, emotions swirling. “...Why?” he whispered, unable to understand why he was so highly valued.

 

“...Do I need a reason?” Zisteau responded just as quietly. “You mean a lot to me Kurt. You might think you aren't worth the effort but you are, believe me. I wish you could see it.”

 

Kurt couldn't think of a thing to say in response.

 

-0-

 

The nightly visits became something of a ritual. Kurt would wake from his nightmares and go see Zisteau who was almost always awake for some reason. Kurt always meant to ask why but Zisteau seemed to see the question coming and deflected it with some other distracting topic. Still, Kurt realised something.

 

The more the nightly visits went on and the more he talked, the less the nightmares terrified him to the point of waking. The Enderman began to appear less frequently the more he spoke to Zisteau about it and the dreams became more about the cave itself rather than what inhabited it. He mentioned it to Zisteau over coffee one night, and the pigman smiled faintly. “I guess talking does help.” he'd responded.

 

That same night, Kurt had finished his coffee early into the chat and elected not to refill his mug. While Zisteau made himself another, Kurt leaned back in the chair and stretched out, yawning tiredly. He almost felt as though he could fall back asleep, oddly enough. It was something he'd never done after the chats and was only just now considering. Perhaps after Zisteau returned with the coffee...

 

Zisteau set his mug down on the table, about to take a seat when he glanced at Kurt. It was hard to fight the smile growing on his face when he realised that Kurt had fallen asleep, looking peaceful despite sleeping on the chair. It said something about how much Kurt had healed over the time he'd been here, that he felt safe and calm enough with Zisteau that he'd fall asleep here. Though it did leave Zisteau with the issue of what to do now.

 

He couldn't just leave him there, it was hardly comfortable and hardly fair to do that. There was the option of lifting him through to his own bed but that seemed a little too far at this time of night. The pigman glanced at the double bed sitting in the corner of the room hesitantly. Was it really wise though? Well, it was better than stumbling through the Lens unable to see the ground beneath his feet while carrying Kurt. The last thing they needed was him dropping them both to the ground. His bed it was.

 

Zisteau was careful, sliding his arms under Kurt's sleeping form and lifting him slowly from the chair. The sleeping Kurt stirred for a moment and he froze, expecting him to awaken. Instead, Kurt muttered something incomprehensible and pressed his face against Zisteau's chest. For a long moment, Zisteau was quite sure his heart had stopped. He couldn't breathe, staring down at the sleeping human in his arms. The only word Zisteau could honestly think of to describe Kurt at that moment was 'perfect' even though he knew Kurt himself would disagree. It was slow careful movements and held breath that he managed to get Kurt onto the bed and pull the covers over it. Of course, while Kurt was happily cuddling into his pillows, it did leave Zisteau wondering what he was going to do.

 

After a moment's pondering, he fetched another blanket from the cupboard to one side, a single blanket rather than the double which Kurt was now wrapped in and gingerly sat down on the bed, throwing it over his legs. He wasn't going to sleep tonight, so the least he could do while he looked over a few things was keep an eye out for Kurt's nightmares and wake him from them before they got too bad. So there he sat in the bed, scribbling away in a notebook filled with charts and maps with a great many crossed out areas. He highlighted some and crossed out others, barely noticing his eyes growing heavier.

 

Within moments, the pigman was snoring softly beside Kurt, notebook on the floor.

 

-0-

 

Zisteau stirred from his sleep as morning light streamed in through the windows, not really wanting to wake up but without much of a choice with a sunbeam blinding him. He grunted and shifted away from the light, - or at least he tried to. Something warm atop his chest stopped too much movement. Opening his eyes and squinting past the light, what he saw convinced him he was still dreaming. Kurt's head was laying on his chest, right hand pressed against his stomach while Zisteau held him close.

 

Apparently he hadn't done a very good job of staying awake last night.

 

Despite kicking himself for sleeping on the job, Zisteau had to admit to himself that waking up like this was...well, it was wonderful, truth be told. He knew it was wrong of him to just watch Kurt rest against him like this for a few moments but he couldn't bring himself to move away. It was rare to get to see Kurt so relaxed and at peace, and like this...for a moment he could almost believe there was something more between them but the moment the thought crossed his mind he ruthlessly crushed it.

 

If Generik was right about anything, he was right about this; what human could ever find anything about him attractive? He didn't stand a chance with Kurt and deluding himself wasn't going to help matters.

 

Lost in his own thoughts, he didn't really notice Kurt stirring until the human was looking him dead in the eyes, blinking back sleep.

 

“...Uh, hi...” Kurt said slowly, face colouring just a little as he realised where he was lying.

 

“...Hi.” Zisteau murmured, a little nervously. He tried to hide it with a laugh. “I didn't, uh, I just woke up, I didn't even mean to fall asleep.”

 

“I didn't either.” Kurt said quietly, fingers tapping at Zisteau's chest without him really even realising. “Sorry...”

 

“No, no. It's alright.” The pigman swallowed, falling silent.

 

For a long moment the pair just looked at each other, Zisteau's heart racing just a little faster than was normal, Kurt's fingers fidgeting nervously just a little ways from it. Zisteau found himself opening his mouth, about to ask -

 

“ZISTEAU!”

 

At the shout, Kurt rocketed backwards so fast he fell out of the bed taking the double quilt with him and ending up a tangled mess on the floor. Zisteau was left with a cold chest and an open mouth, confused for all of a second before he groaned and sat up. “God damnit Pause.” he muttered, peeking over the edge of the bed to check on Kurt. The covers moved with a soft groan and Zisteau assumed that he was fine for the moment. He sighed and got off the bed, straightening out his loin cloth as he called, “In here Pause!”

 

The door opened not a moment later and in stepped the Indian himself, his headdress bumping against the door lintel. He ducked inside to avoid it being knocked off, straightening it. “Hey Z, got some good news for ya – whoa...” Pause broke off delivering whatever news he had to share as he saw Kurt lift his head from the other side of the bed, wrapped in blankets and hair all mussed from trying to escape their clutch. “Hope I'm not interrupting?” Pause said with a sly grin directed at Zisteau, elbowing him in the side.

 

“What – no!” Zisteau denied it before Kurt could even open his mouth. “Get your mind out the gutter Pause. We're just friends.”

 

“Just friends like me and you or like Nebris and MC?” Pause directed at Kurt.

 

The poor man gawked, at a loss for words until Zisteau butted in, stepping in front of Pause and blocking his view of Kurt. “Knock it off Pause.”

 

“Fine, fine. Not what I came here for anyway. I have some news you might be interested in.” Pause's smile fell away, becoming serious. “I found them.”

 

As Zisteau stiffened, Kurt rose from the blankets and dumped them on the bed, “Found who?”

 

“The B-Team.” Both Pause and Zisteau said.

 

“Exactly.” Pause nodded, feathery headdress bouncing a little with the movement.

 

“Show me.” Zisteau was all business, turning to lead Pause to the desk covered in maps and charts.

 

It occurred to Kurt that he really should have guessed that was what Zisteau had been searching for this whole time. Thoughts of the B-Team gave him mixed feelings and left a bad taste in his mouth. What would hunting them down accomplish? Would it make things better for anyone? A part of him wanted nothing more than to track them down and give them a taste of their own medicine but at the same time, he wasn't sure it would really help. He almost missed what the others were saying as he thought.

 

“I'll show you on one condition,” Pause was saying as he glanced over the maps.

 

“What?” Zisteau was willing to pay quite the high price for this information, provided Pause didn't want anything too outlandish that was.

 

“Leave Millbee to me. You can have the others, but Millbee is mine to deal with.”

 

Zisteau looked up at the tall Indian, seeing the hurt behind the angry mask he wore. No way was he going to get in the middle of Pause's revenge there. “Deal.”

 

Pause pulled out a map of his own from the quiver on his back and spread it on the table. The town was circled in green ink, co-ordinates written beside the site. “We do this together.” He said. “It's the only way this is going to work.”

Zisteau nodded, memorising the location for the future. “We'll need to stake it out, plan our attack.”

 

Kurt edged his way into the discussion around the table, peering at the map. “We need to free the villagers.” he said decisively. “They're just slaves, we can't leave them there.”

 

Zisteau glanced at Pause before focusing on Kurt. “Are you sure you want to do this?” he asked quietly.

 

“I'm not an invalid any more Zisteau. If you're both going after them, then why can't I? I have more right than you do anyway.” Kurt wasn't going to back down. “At least this way I can ask them why they did it.”

 

Zisteau hesitated, still wanting to protect Kurt despite the fact he knew Kurt didn't need it any more. He'd done what he could and Kurt was perfectly capable of handling himself now. “Alright. Let's plan a scouting mission, then we'll see what we're dealing with.”

-0-

Authors Notes: I swear, this was supposed to be entirely serious and then Pause came in and just smashed all sense of seriousness in my brain. He was gonna be the badass indian who surprised Zisteau while he was out cutting down trees, coming out of nowhere and making a deal with him then but then this happened and I honestly couldn't make Serious Pause work for long so I gave in and let him be his silly self.

As for Zisteau having actual bedrooms and not just a bed in the hallway, I realise that they were needed and that he still hadn't really done anything to the smallest circle of the Lens right at the very bottom so that is where they're kind of placed for the moment. I think that works, if not, then imagine an extra layer and stick some bedrooms in it. Also a portal room. Done :D

 

Comments

[mzrootbeer]

About to cry from cuteness/longingness (yes that is a word now)
Then boom! In walks pause.

Anyways this is simply adorable.

[theropod]

Pause is a moodkiller, clearly :D

Glad you enjoyed!

[guiltyshirts]

All the <3. Seriously. :D

[theropod]

All thanks to you <3 Seriously, this wouldn't be around without that comment of yours.

[guiltyshirts]

Hey, I may have a mind that runs away with ideas, but the writing is all yours. <3

[theropod]

Heh, this is true I guess :3

[mindcrack_love]

:D oh man, this is great! I love this story arc so much and I'm so glad to see more of it. Silly Zisteau doesn't know what to do with his feelings or with the concept that he's capable of being quite loveable even as a zombie pigman, poor thing. We will see if/when/how Kurt knocks some sense into his brain in the future, I hope?

Also, silly Pause is silly but was also kind of exactly what was needed in that moment, and the fact that he also wants revenge - and wants Millbee for himself, however you want to interpret that - is great.

Also, I may have actually giggled and clapped in real life when you chose MC and Nebris to be the "canon" pairing for comparison, ahahahahhaa. :3 :3 :3

[isi]

I also laughed quite a bit at the MC/Nebs reference.

[theropod]

:D Yay

[theropod]

Kurt possibly will knock that sense into him I'd hope :D I'm enjoying the uncertainty from him, and while it is mostly his own thoughts, that comment from Generik certainly wouldn't have helped.

Pause is Pause, what can you do? When he catches up with Millbee, and he will, there is going to be quite the confrontation.

And yes, that mention of MC/Nerbis was pretty much just for you, even though I find it adorable too :D I wanted something that was fun but wasn't OOG since they're going off to take those two down, being compared to them would probably be a bad thing in a way.

[lurkey_dfw]

Well that was an emotional roller coaster, haha. That's a good thing though, very much enjoying this whole thing.

[theropod]

Thank you :D Glad you enjoyed!

[koalaed]

When Zisteau wakes up, you can feel the pull between fondness and uncertainty in the piece's narration. It's so touching how he and Kurt are comfortable enough to sleep so closely with one another, even if only on a subconscious level, yet you perfectly portray his hesitation and uncertainty at the same time. He doesn't think Kurt could love a pigman like him, so he has a sense of insecurity about sharing such an intimate moment with him. What a lovely, lovely portrayal of their current, evolving relationship. Those paragraphs where he's just woken up have to be my favorites. The entire piece is so lovely and full of emotion. I'm glad it ended up being six pages instead of shorter than that! :)

Also, Pause is the perfect mixture between silly and intense. Bravo!

[theropod]

I was trying hard to get that emotion across, I'm so glad I've done it well enough for you to find it your favourite <3 I hate it in stories when there's two character either in love or supposedly falling for each other but you can't get a feel for their emotions during it all, so I try to explore that as much as I can.

Yay for getting Pause right :D

[crystalllized]

Pausey <3 Way to ruin the mood, Pause! Of course, though, who else would be intense and dedicated and full of desire for revenge like Zisteau to help with the B-Team? I've said it before and I'll say it again...despite the fact that they've had tons of interaction, I'll never be able to bring myself to ship them because they are too damn alike, and that entire section just gets that relationship perfectly.

MC/Nebs! Yay. It's difficult not to pick OOG for a canon pairing, because they are, but I was so beyond pleasantly surprised to see that. I almost want to see a side story for them in this world. I guess all the typical canon pairings would have been wrapped up in complexity in that moment, so good choice there.

As for the Single Malt interaction, it's adorable and heartbreaking and so sweet. And with Zisteau's entire terrible perception being based on something Genny said, I really hope to see a confrontation there.

If it wasn't obvious, I loved it.

[theropod]

Confrontations will be had, rest assured! Zisteau may get a knock to the head that helps him along or he may not!

Nebs/MC was just a little thing I added in there, I'm not sure if I could write them well enough at this stage yet but who knows, maybe at a later stage I might attempt something. Right now, I don't have a decent enough grasp of their personalities yet :(

Glad you enjoyed <3

[kissingpigmen]

Aah this is the best! Kurt/Z is so SAD I LOVE IT

(fanart is here hi)

[theropod]

-incoherent flailing in delight- <3 Thank you so much for the fanart, that is incredible and just so perfect! There are no word <3 Wow, just incredible! Would you mind if I linked it above for everyone to see?

[kissingpigmen]

I don't mind at all!

[theropod]

It's up there! Thank you so much <3

[(Anonymous)]

So far I am completely in love with this fic and can't find anything that's bad. :)

But the one thing I think would make this even better (than continuing) is a prologue. Like how Kurt got in the cave or maybe how the explosion went.
But you know, that's just a thought. :)

[theropod]

True, I didn't write the beginning of Kurt's involvement with the bomb. I might do so in the future, it could be a fun thing to do.