mindcracklove | Fic: Gift

theropod posting in

A continuation from Nightmares.

The trio prepares for the upcoming assault on the B-Team, among other things...

-0-

“I can't believe I've been here for three days and we haven't even done anything!” Pause complained bitterly, throwing himself down on the seat opposite Zisteau's paper covered desk. The pigman barely glanced at him before continuing with his calculations and notes.

“I'm sorry Pause, did you actually want to succeed at this or did you want them to just slaughter us when we charge in sword drawn, banner flying on the backs of our mighty pig steeds?” Zisteau asked sarcastically.

Pause scowled at him. “I was expecting to be able to, I dunno, kill something at least.” he muttered.

“Tell you what Pause, go thin down my cow herd, we're going to need the food when we stake out the town. I think I'm almost done here. Once I know what we need, we can get it and begin to do this properly.”

“Why isn't Kurt killing the cows?” Pause whined. “Why isn't he doing anything?”

“Kurt's being far more helpful than you right now.” Zisteau sighed. “Enough whining, go do something before I drop kick you out of here.”

“Like you could even catch me!” The Indian laughed and fled the room before Zisteau could throw something at him.

“Damn Indian.” Zisteau muttered, looking back over his calculations for gunpowder requirements and realising he'd misplaced a decimal point somewhere along the line. “...Damnit Pause.”

-0-

Down in the wooded grove, Kurt was swinging an axe into the nearest oak tree, grunting every so often with the effort. He still tired easily but just doing something like this was helping him get used to using his muscles again and the ache he felt after attacking trees with a half blunt axe was satisfying. He didn't feel so useless when he could at least carry out the basic task of gathering supplies. With one last swing, the last of the tree was down and he sighed in satisfaction, leaning back against another tree. His arms were sore and his back too but he felt good. With a smile, he set aside the axe and began to gather up the logs he'd cut up.

Zisteau had asked him to do a few things around the Lens, nothing too straining, just little things to help out. Yesterday he'd been tasked with shearing the sheep in the indoor enclosure Zisteau had turned his old home into, today it was collecting some wood. Idly he couldn't help but wonder what this had to do with the plan Zisteau seemed to be coming up with. Still, at least he was doing something helpful.

Something moved behind him and Kurt glanced back, expecting it to be Pause come to pester him about his and Zisteau's non-existent relationship yet again. A half scorched skeletal archer crouched under the protective boughs of a spruce was not what he expected. The first arrow flew by his ear, narrowly missing him. The delay in the creature drawing another arrow gave Kurt enough time to drop the logs, grab the abandoned axe and rush at it.

The skeleton rattled its lower jaw in response to the threat and drew back the bow string, aiming for Kurt's unarmoured form. Almost too late, he swung the axe down and severed the bony arms from the creature, forcing it to drop the bow and step back, jaw rattling. Sunlight hit the monster and it burst into flames even as Kurt swung again, taking the flaming skull from its shoulders. The archer collapsed and within seconds most of the bones were ash, disappearing in the slight breeze. A few remained and Kurt automatically picked them up in case they were needed. Such things could be useful after all.

It wasn't until he was collected the wood again that Kurt realised that he hadn't panicked during the brief fight. He hadn't hesitated. Even now he felt pretty calm about it. Well, it wasn't an Enderman...but it was a start. He smiled a little smile as he hefted the wood he'd collected and began to make his way to the storage area for it beside the sheep.

-0-

Pause was storing away the meat he'd harvested when Kurt returned to the main Lens. Naturally, Kurt went to duck around him in the hopes of avoiding another awkward interrogation but Pause spotted him before he could escape.

“Kurt!”

Kurt cringed in the doorway, cursing his luck before he turned to Pause. “Yes?”

“Think you could give me a hand?” he asked, nodding to the stacks of leather sitting around him, his own arms filled with meat. “It's taking forever on my own and you know Zisteau, it's gotta be perfectly organised.”

Kurt was surprised. “That – that's it? No awkward question about me and Zisteau sharing a bed? No crude joke?” he asked disbelievingly.

“No. Just help me put this stuff in the right chests. You can do the leather...” Pause grinned cheekily and added, “unless you'd rather be the one to handle Zisteau's meat?”

“Pause!”

“Kidding!”

Kurt turned away to store the leather, face burning. He didn't notice Zisteau silently climbing down from the rafters above them, giving Pause a thumbs up and sneaking outside and down to his room.

Pause just grinned and continued with his task.

-0-

A few days later, Kurt was heading to his bed after a day spent gathering more resources on behalf of Zisteau. He and Pause had spent a few hours collecting ores and the rest of the day had been devoted to picking off creepers from a distance. He may have even picked up a few bow tricks from Pause along the way.

The Indian in question had headed to bed already it seemed and Kurt was bound for his own when someone called his name. He hesitated, glancing back to see Zisteau hanging by his bedroom door.

“Hey.” Zisteau said quietly. “You got a minute?”

“For you? Sure.” Kurt hadn't really expected to sleep much that night anyway. They only had a day left before they were moving out to set up the attack on the B Team and sleep still didn't come as easily as it had the night he'd slept beside Zisteau. He was still trying to figure out why he'd felt so comfortable and at ease in those arms. He could only come to one conclusion, really, and he wasn't sure if it was something Zisteau would entirely appreciate.

“I've got something to show you.” Zisteau showed no sign of knowing what Kurt was thinking of and motioned for him to follow him out and up the lit stairs around the Lens. They climbed in silence until the highest level, where Zisteau paused by the side of the room. “Come here.” he said softly, holding out his hand.

Kurt hesitated, unable to see why Zisteau would want him alone in a dark corner – well, he could think of one reason but somehow he doubted Zisteau would want him like that -

“Kurt?” Zisteau still held out his hand, waiting patiently for him.

“Sorry.” He apologised swiftly and took the hand, noticing the rough callouses from the work and the sword usage in the pigman's daily life. It was just as warm as his chest had been, he noted absently as he threaded his fingers with Zisteau's.

Zisteau gave him a slightly lopsided grin and gently tugged him closer, drawing out an ender pearl. “Hold on.” he warned just before he threw it directly up. Kurt's eyes barely had time to widen before they were teleported upwards, leaving him faintly disoriented and leaning against the solid pigman at his side. Zisteau steadied him with a hand on his shoulder, the other still being firmly gripped by Kurt. “You okay?”

“I'm fine, don't worry -” Kurt broke off when he lifted his gaze to see where they were, mouth hanging open in shock. “Oh.”

Zisteau smiled, having eyes only for Kurt. “I worked on it while you were recovering and I was adding the final touches while you were helping Pause.”

“Oh wow.”

“You like it?”

'It' was the new level situated just under the water troughs that fed the farms surrounding the Lens. Dark wood made up the flooring just as it had in the layers below but it was the ceiling that had captured Kurt's attention. It was glass, but not quite the usual kind. Through it, the stars above were magnified to twice their usual size. It wasn't a telescope but it certainly made for something beautiful to view. Over to one side, a double bed was set up, a dresser and lamp beside it. Over to another was a desk much like the one Zisteau had in his own room, but instead of land maps, this one had several star charts and even a few books Zisteau had managed to find concerning the stars Kurt loved so much. It was quite clear he'd spent a long time on this surprise for him.

Kurt could hardly believe his eyes, lost in the stars above him. It was amazing to think that Zisteau had done this for him...He tore his eyes from the sky, gazing instead at the pigman who still held his hand. “You did this for me?” he asked incredulously, unable to really believe he deserved such an incredible gift. He could hardly believe it when Zisteau nodded. “But why?”

“I'd been going to ask if you wanted to stay.” Zisteau hesitated. “Here. With me.”

“Stay?” Kurt repeated. “You mean for good?”

“Well, maybe not for good, just as long as you feel comfortable. I made this so that, as corny as it sounds, you'll always have a place here. Even if you decide to leave...You can always come back.” Zisteau was finding it hard to look away from Kurt as he spoke, fingers still entwined with Kurt's from the teleport up.

Kurt swallowed, feet shuffling against the floor as he shifted just a little closer. “I suppose having my own place here...couldn't be so bad.” He gave a nervous laugh. “And here was me thinking you'd get tired of me hanging around.”

Zisteau shook his head. “That's impossible.”

“I don't know,” Kurt gave him a little smile. “You manage to make impossible things happen on a pretty regular basis.”

“Nothing's impossible, it just takes some imagination.” Zisteau said quietly, returning Kurt's smile. “I guess it helps to have some inspiration around.” His free hand rose almost without his realising it, the backs of his fingers brushing Kurt's scarred cheek.

Kurt's eyes widened at the touch, heart stuttering in his chest for the briefest moment. Did Zisteau care for him as...more than a friend? He barely completed the thought before the hand was drawn away, Zisteau letting go of his hand and stepping back, looking a little panicked.

“I'm sorry – I shouldn't...” He shook his head, the one intact ear upon his head folded back in distress. “I'll leave you to sleep. Sorry.” he added again, backing up until he could drop down the ladder in the corner.

“Zisteau, wait!” Kurt protested too late, the pigman already gone. That hadn't gone how he wanted it to at all... Mentally beating himself about it, Kurt made his way to the bed, dropping down to lie on his back and gaze up at the stars.

It all made sense if he thought about it. The fact Zisteau was easily manipulated when he was on the line, the ceaseless search for him, the care and help, this room...Zisteau had to feel something more than friendship towards him. Kurt's stomach churned with nerves. Well great, but what was he supposed to do about it? The thought of confronting Zisteau came to mind but if he was mistaken, then he'd just embarrass himself. If he was right, could he really ask for a relationship? What if he royally screwed it up and they fell out over nothing? What if it didn't work out?

Kurt groaned and rolled over, burying his face into the pillows. Why were emotions so complicated?

-0-

Zisteau lay back on his bed, eyes shut as he mentally beat himself up for the slip up. Under the star light and with only a faint glow from the redstone lamps, Kurt had looked so perfect...he hadn’t even realised what he'd done until Kurt's eyes had widened. How could he be so stupid?

He rolled onto his side, back to the door, and yanked the covers over his head. If he was lucky, Kurt wouldn't hate him for it in the morning. As it was, he almost expected Kurt to politely decline the room and quietly slip out into the dawn never to return. Losing Kurt because of a stupid mistake...it was the worst thing he could imagine. He could easily handle never breathing a worth of his affections, could stand to admire from afar and simply be Kurt's friend. He could not stand the thought of losing that friendship.

Not once did he consider that Kurt felt the same way. Kurt was never going to feel anything more than platonic towards him. Zisteau didn't kid himself, he wasn't exactly a diamond to look at. Perhaps back home he was worth more than a glance but up here in the land of the sun an moon, he was little more than another hideous creature to the local denizens.

Zisteau was so busy hating himself for potentially destroying a friendship that he didn't hear the soft footsteps heading towards his bed. He was only broken from the cycle of self loathing when he felt the mattress sink and someone tug the covers up to slip under them. This time it was his own eyes that widened.

“Kurt?!”

Kurt swallowed and gave a nervous smile. “Hi. Um...Look, I know this is probably really stupid and presumptuous of me but I was thinking about the thing you did up there and everything you've done for me and I just wanted to ask what you meant by it because if you meant what I thought you meant then that's okay because I wanted to say that I maybe feel the same way but then if you didn't mean what I thought you meant then that's okay too and I can just go-”

Zisteau was having a hard time keeping track of the run on sentence but he managed to pick up on what he thought – what he hoped – Kurt was saying. “You feel the same way?” he interrupted, focusing on the most important thing rather bluntly.

Kurt paused, mouth kind of hanging open mid word. “Uh...yes? Yes. I do. I think. I mean it feels like I do. Oh no.” he laughed nervously and rubbed at his hair, looking away. There really wasn't much else to look at under the covers unless it was Zisteau however. “I'm not good at this, you probably know that. But I've never felt this...this safe or this at ease with anyone. No one else gets me like you, no one else does...insane things like scour the world until they find my sorry butt, or build me an entire room just to ask me to stay a while longer. There's no one else in the world like you Zisteau, and I guess what I'm saying is...is...” he struggled to find the words. “I want...I want to be with you. I want to have coffee with you in the morning and late at night when we can't sleep. I want to stargaze with you, I want to explore the world by your side, I want to see your home. I want to wake up in your arms again and feel like I'm safe from everything and that no matter what I can-” Kurt was silenced by a gentle touch on his cheek.

Zisteau's thumb was stroking the skin there, the pigman had shifted closer as Kurt poured his heart out. He met Kurt's eyes with an intensity there that almost made Kurt look away. “I want that too.” Zisteau said softly. “And more. Stay with me Kurt?”

There was far more to that question than him simply asking Kurt to move in, so much more and Kurt knew it. He reached up and covered the hand brushing his cheek with his own. “Yes.” he whispered, “I'll stay.”

-0-

Pause drew back from the doorway, a little smile on his face. At last! He'd been wondering if he would have to lock the pair of them in a room alone to get them to admit to their feelings. At least now they had each other, regardless of what was coming in the next few days.

He pushed himself off the wall and headed back to bed, moccasin shoes making no noise on the floor as he considered the coming days. The B-Team would be dealt with, there was no way Zisteau was letting them get out of this alive and he severely doubted Kurt would stay his hand if given the chance to take down the pair. There were a few things to consider, however.

Millbee was one of them. Millbee was part of that traitorous team. Pause felt his hands curl into fists as he replayed the trial in his head. Not once had he thought...

Damnit Millbee, you were supposed to be on our side. On my side.

Everything had been planned so perfectly. Pause was to be their lawyer, Millbee their friend and confidante. They were supposed to get in and out with as much information as possible to win the trial. But it had all gone so horribly wrong...

Pause didn't even try laying down on the bed, turning on his heel and heading out into the main room again then out into the night. He sat down on the edge of the platform, legs hanging out into space. He wasn't stupid, he did have an ender pearl or two on him in case he slipped but right now he was a little preoccupied by thoughts of the rainbow traitor.

Millbee had gotten in too deep. He'd bought into his own lie, living the part he was supposed to play. A rogue chess piece on the board. One that had no intention of returning to its original role. As Pause stared down at the distant landscape, eagle eyes picking out the roaming monsters of the night, he briefly wondered how he was going to handle taking down his partner. Beef had refused to play a part in it this time and Etho desired no further conflict, already bored of the little criminal organisation. So, it was up to him to bring Millbee back, or take him out with the rest of the little family of traitors.

Pause stared down at the distant landscape and briefly considered jumping. It would be easier than thinking of how to bring down someone he loved.

Damnit Millbee...