subliminalcircles: Drawn by me! (Default)
[personal profile] subliminalcircles posting in [community profile] mindcracklove
Mama mia, I haven't posted in a while.

But this masterpiece happened when Jimmy Jams told me to write a story about Vechs and an enchilada.

Enyoy.

Vechs yawned as sunlight flitted through the blinds and cast blinding torture spots on his face. Even though it wasn’t a work day, he slammed his fist on the alarm clock anyways, and he giggled maniacally when it shattered into pieces.

Oh wait, it’s morning. He thought, and he straightened his face. Straight as a pencil. Yeahhhhh.

He stumbled out of his blanket burrito, then he realized he had 20/40 vision. He put on his goggles and viola! Normal vision!

Time to get on with the day! Vechs kicked the door of his bedroom open and strutted down the hallway and into the kitchen. I should probably make some breakfast.

Vechs decided a complete, balanced breakfast would do, and he went to reach for some Jimmy Jams™ even though he was pretty sure they were illegal. But, mama mia, they were gone!

He broke out into a groan as he saw a hot pink sticky note on the pantry door saying “MY JIMMY JAMS!!!1!!!!!Q1!!iI!” It was not signed.

“Dangit, now what am I going to have for breakfast?” Vechs HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMmmed for about an hour tops before snapping his fingers. “I know! I’ll just maka meh some enchiladas!”

Vechs kicked the fridge door open (which was kinda hard considering it opened outward) and grabbed some CHEESE.

And…. CHEESE!!

Wait.

Where is the chicken?

Vechs GROANED SOME MORE at the sight of another hot pink sticky note, this time signed, by none other than Bitsy. “MY CHICKY CHANS!!!@1!111!!1”

“Dang. Now how am I gonna make enchiladas?” After HM MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMing for another hour, Vechs thought of a solution. “I will replace the CHICKEN with LUCKY CHARMSSSSSS™!!!!!!!!!”

But to no avail, for where the Lucky Charms™ should’ve been was a hot pink sticky note that read “MY LUCKY CHARMSSSSSSS!!!!!!11911!!! -The Mainframe.”

“WELL FINE, I WILL JUST HAVE A CHEESE ENCHILADA.”

Thank goodness no one took the tortillas or the jalepeños or Vechs would’ve kicked something. He buttered up a sweet, sweet tortilla and put cheese and jalepeños on it. He rolled it up like the burrito Pyro was and put it in the microwave. After it was finished, he dumped an entire tub of sour cream on it.

But then he realized the plate was still in the microwave.

Vechs panicked and yanked the plate out, but then started tossing it about like a hot potato. “MAMA MIA, THIS ISA SPICY MEATBALL”

The plate landed on the hardwood floor and immediately burst into flames.

OH NO, I MUST SAVE THE ENCHILADA!! As the fire consumed everything around him, Vechs leaped heroically to his enchilada not caring that it was still hot. He’s faced the hellish wrath of a hot plate. He could handle anything.

Time slowed as he booked for the door, then realizing that only one could make it out alive. In a last heroic effort, Vechs threw the enchilada out the now-open door and stumbled to the ground. A single tear rolled down his cheek, but he smiled as he knew the enchilada was safe.

BTC walked in, enchilada in hand, and looked around the place. “Vechs. What. The crud.”

Vechs looked up, dazed. “B- what? Am I ded?”

“I will tell you what happened. You threw an enchilada at me as I was walking by.”

“Wait. I’m not ded?”

“Of COURSE NOT.”

“Th-then. The fire. W-”

“What HAPPENED in here??”

“Breakfast.”

Vechs then woke up, followed immediately by the realization that his dear enchilada never existed.
There was silence.

Even more silence.

The ticking of one thousand bombs, eminiting louder and louder with each passing plank…

A flash of light rang outwards from the back of Vech’s head and through his eyes. He could not see.

Mama mia… he thought sadly.

And then the world was covered in spaghetti.

LE FIN

Date: Friday, April 1st, 2016 03:06 pm (UTC)
jiminee: (Default)
From: [personal profile] jiminee
“MY CHICKY CHANS!!!@1!111!!1”

Date: Friday, April 1st, 2016 04:41 pm (UTC)
ruddiestbubbles: (Default)
From: [personal profile] ruddiestbubbles
I don't even know what I just read, but it was magical XD

Date: Friday, April 1st, 2016 05:08 pm (UTC)
coolboynbg_1: (Default)
From: [personal profile] coolboynbg_1
sub why

Date: Friday, April 1st, 2016 08:40 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Wat. I don't even...
-Observing Anon

Date: Saturday, April 2nd, 2016 08:44 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I don't even understand and can not process nor contemplate the text or words in which I have just read.
-Observing Anon

Date: Sunday, April 3rd, 2016 05:55 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
2 spoopy 4 me
-Observing Anon

Date: Saturday, April 2nd, 2016 02:46 am (UTC)
scara: Steampunk hat (Default)
From: [personal profile] scara
*reads*
*sits back*
*opens mouth to speak but nothing comes out*
*closes mouth*
*turns and walks away to contemplate the nonsense*

Date: Saturday, April 2nd, 2016 09:19 am (UTC)
scara: Steampunk hat (Default)
From: [personal profile] scara
Indeed :P

Date: Saturday, April 2nd, 2016 05:43 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
*opens mouth*
*spaghetti flies into it*
*closes mouth*
*chews*
*thinks "oh no, I have been infected with makes no senseitis"*
*doesn't care*

After reading something like that I always try to make it make sense but it never does. I like this, though.

-the lurkiest lurker

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