I Miss You

[marsgemwrites]

I've had this idea in my head for the past few days and decided to write it. It's short and sweet, enjoy.

Chad sat down had his desk. He was holding a pad and pencil - he didn't trust himself with a pen - in one hand and a coffee in the other. He placed the coffee mug down carefully and opened the notepad.

He'd been told writing would help. Chad wanted it to be personal so he was writing it by hand.

He pulled his chair forward and started to write.

"Dear Sevadus,

You left 12 days ago and I miss you. God I miss you so much. Other times we've been away from each other I knew you'd come back. But this time…" Chad ripped the page out from the pad and discarded it.

"Dear Sevadus,

I miss you. Where are you? Why did you leave me?" He felt tears welling up in his eyes and ripped out the page again.

"Why aren't you coming back! You knew I loved you and you left me! It's not fair!" Chad buried his head in his arms. Writing wasn't helping, it was making it worse. He took a deep breath and tried again.

"Dear Sevadus,

I miss you so much. The bed is cold without you there. I watch TV and I can't curl up to you. There's no one to wake up to, no one to fall asleep to. No one to share my day with. Why did you go? Why couldn't you stay? Why didn't you put up a fight? I know you were tired of fighting, but why not keep fighting? For me?" Chad watched a tear splash onto the paper, he ignored it, "You didn't have to leave, it would have been okay if you stayed. Why? Why did you leave? It's not fair! Nothing about this is fair! I'm all alone and you're far away! I will never hear your laugh again! I will never kiss you again.

I will never hug you. Make you breakfast and burn it. Walk through the park because you had a bad day and felt like getting out. Listen to you ramble about science I don't understand.

I loved you so much and you LEFT ME. There's a hole in my heart, Sevadus. You made that hole… why did you make the hole? WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME?" Chad was shaking, but he kept writing, "I miss you. I miss you, I miss you, I miss you, I miss you!

That stupid beep. That stupid long beep! The pain in my chest when I heard it! Why did you stop fighting? I loved you! I loved you so much. I loved you with every beat of my heart and you left me! You could have kept fighting… And now…" Chad had tears streaming down his face. He was a mess.

He felt anger boiling up inside him. Why would Sevadus give up fighting? He was doing so well.

"AND NOW YOU'RE DEAD! YOU'RE BURIED! AND I LOST YOU!" Chad found himself shouting, "Why couldn't I save you? Why wasn't I able to save you from death!?"

Chad shook from emotion, "I should have saved you, I'm sorry I couldn't save you. I miss you. I miss you so much."