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Sometimes help doesn't actually help.


"Thanks for letting us stay here Vechs." Zisteau says, grabbing his satchel from beside the couch where he'd dropped it the night before.

"You know you're always welcome here!" Vechs says with a mischievous smile, just like always.

Kurt stood awkwardly beside Zisteau, trying to keep himself together, which was hard with the constantly swirling emotions in his head.

"Do you need any supplies to take with you?"

Zisteau nodded. "Some clean water and food would be nice."

Vechs nods, heading from the room. Zisteau turns to Kurt, really noticing how tired he looked.

"How ya holding up?" He asked gently.

Kurt shrugged, his ever so intriguing eyes dull, yet bright. "I dunno... Its just kinda rough right now..."

"You'll get through this."

"Will I really though?" Kurt asks sadly.

He nods quickly. "Of course you will!"

Kurt shakes his head sadly. "No I won't. I never will."

He let out a sigh. "Kurt, listen, I know this is hard right now. I know them being gone is difficult, but you will get through this, and I'll be here to help you through it."

Kurt just shook his head. "Whatever.... Its not like you'd listen to me, no one ever has or will."

He was taken aback by Kurt's sudden coldness. But he didn't get to counter as Vechs started talking. "Come here Z."

"Coming." He says unsurely, making his way towards Vechs' voice.

"Z, I hate to discourage you, for anything, but these 'feelings' you have for Kurt, you may want to try to ignore them."

He gave Vechs a look. "Why?" He questioned, knowing there was a reason for every word that Vechs spoke.

"I just have a feeling it won't end well, for either of you. And I don't wanna see you with a broken heart again."

"You do not need to bring that up." He says, giving Vechs a stern look.

"Remember when you were fifteen?"

He lets out an aggravated huff of air, giving Vechs a look that, if looks could kill, Vechs would surely be a pile of ash.

"Remember that boy, the one that always wore that mask? Remember how quickly you fell for him?"

"What's the point if this?" He asks, feeling very pissed off.

"You remember how long you two were together? Do you remember the day that the bomb went off..."

"Would you just fuck off!" He yelled, his hands clenched in tight fists, his knuckles white, tears stinging his eyes.

Vechs crossed his arms, his icy blue eyes not filled with mischief for once. "You know I'm only trying to help."

"How is reminding me that I lost him helping me any?!?"

Vechs let out a sigh. "I'm just trying to make you realize what could happen if you pursue these feelings you have for Kurt."

He scoffed. "If anything, Vechs, you've made me realize that I'm a horrible person, because I'm the reason Etho died." Zisteau says coldly as he turns and walks from the room, a single tear rolling down his scared pink cheek. He walked towards the door, motioning Kurt to follow, which he did, without question.

A tense silence hung in the air as they walked down the road quickly, or as quickly as they could with Kurt's vision. Both looked tired, and felt it too. Zisteau's mind was on the past, a thing he tried to forget, for that was for the best. He remembered that day so well. He remembered the ear-piercing scream. He remembered the evil smirks, the laughs, the gun fire; everything.

"Awww come on E!" Zisteau whined playfully. "You wouldn't make me go all the way over there to get it, would you?"

"You're so lazy Z." Etho rolled his eyes, standing up. "There's no sense in trying to convince you to get off your butt to walk across the street."

"Nope." Zisteau giggled, sending the silver haired boy a smile.

"You're just lucky I like you so much."

"I am lucky." Zisteau replied, motioning for Etho to come closer, which he did.

Zisteau kissed him deeply, letting his fingers tangle in Etho's silky silver hair. He pulled away, a soft look in his blue-green eyes, that Etho always swore were the most beautiful thing in this dreary world.

"Love ya E." Zisteau says as Etho starts to walk across the street towards the market.

"Love ya too Z." Etho responded with a bright smile as he glanced back at his blond haired boyfriend.

Zisteau watched as his boyfriend disappeared into the little market building. He couldn't help but smile as he waited for the silver haired boy to return. His eyes quickly scanned around him as he heard gun shots. His head shot back to the little market as he heard a loud explosion and felt the ground shake beneath himself. He was quickly on his feet, running toward the market, which was now just rubble.

"ETHO!" He yelled desperately. "ETHO!" He called again, tears stinging his eyes.

He pushed through the crowd of people that had formed, trying desperately to get into the destroyed building. He stood at the entrance, or what had once been the entrance, and what he saw broke his heart.

"Etho..." His voice cracked as he tried to speak, his gaze landing on an a body, one with burnt silver hair, that laid there unmoving, un-breathing. He screamed, not knowing what else to do as the tears fell down his face.

He wiped at his eyes, trying rid the tears that had started falling down his cheeks slowly. He was so angry, so annoyed, so sad. He felt like he wanted to punch something, yet he wanted to curl up into a ball and cry until he couldn't cry anymore. He hated Vechs so much sometimes. He could be so ignorant, so idiotic. He didn't know what was best for Zisteau. No one did except himself. And even he was unsure sometimes. He kicked a loose piece of road, cursing silently as it hurt his toe. He finally looked around them, trying to hold back tears, as he tried to figure out where they were. He pulled out his map, locating a small settlement called Finch Farm, which happened to be about a mile away from them.

He continued to stay quiet as they continued their walk, which seemed to drag on forever. As the minutes passed, Zisteau became less and less angry. He was just sad now. He missed Etho. He missed having a boyfriend. He missed feeling loved and wanted. He missed fitting in. He missed home and his family. He let out a sigh, rubbing a bottle cap in his pocket as they he continued walking. After a while, they reached the small farming settlement. Zisteau located an inn, and walked into the lobby, Kurt following close behind.

"Sir." The woman behind the desk spits out. "We don't serve your kind here."

He growled angrily. "I am human, thank you very much."

"Ha! Like I'd believe that." She says cruelly.

"Now miss Mia, that is not how we treat guests, especially not personal friends of mine." Says a masculine voice.

"But he's a monster." She protests, pure disgust on her face.

"If you're going to be a jerk, get your ass out." The man says strictly.

She huffs angrily and leaves.

"Sorry about her." Says the man, greeting the two.

Zisteau just sighs, shaking his head. "Some people just don't understand Beef."

"I know." The man, Beef, says sadly. "Anyway, what can I do for ya?" He asks, forcing a smile.

"We need a place to stay tonight."

"The room on the top floor is all yours. Two beds." Beef says, quickly shaking his head as Zisteau dug in his pocket to get some bottle caps. "Its on the house."

"I can pay, really." Zisteau argued.

Beef just shook his head, smiling. "I'm not letting you pay a single cap."

Zisteau puts his hands up in defeat. "You win." He cracks a smile. "Thanks."

"Hey, no problem at all." Beef gives him a look over. "You need to talk?" He asks knowingly.

Zisteau nods. "You can head upstairs, if you'd like, Kurt."

"Um yeah, sure." Kurt says, speaking for the first time in hours.

"I'll be up in a while."

Kurt just nods, heading slowly towards the stairs, squinting the whole time.

"So what's wrong?" Beef asks after they get situated in chairs, which were overly comfy.

"Life." Zisteau answered with a humorless laugh.

"Not what I meant." Beef counters simply.

"I know." Zisteau sighs. "Hearing people call me a monster.... It hurts..."

"I know it does."

"And...." Zisteau says unsurely. "Vechs mentioned Etho earlier...."

"Ohhhhh." Beef says, his blue eyes full understanding.

"A-and I was so mad at Vechs for bringing him up... But now I'm just sad."

"Hey, that's understandable. You did love him."

"I did... A lot."

Beef smiles sadly at Zisteau. "You know he's gone. He has been for so long. Don't you think it's time to move on? Find someone new?"

"But what the same thing that happened to Etho happens to him too...."

"But what if it doesn't?" Beef says with a light smile. "Whoever this 'he' is, I'd take the chance. I mean, what is left in life if you don't take chances?"

Zisteau just nods. "Thank you, Beef." He stands up, stretching slightly.

Beef stands up too. "No problem Z. Goodnight, sleep well."

"Night." He waves as he starts up the steps, making his way to the top floor.

When he entered the room, he saw Kurt fast asleep on one of the beds. He looked young, innocent, at peace. Zisteau shook his head sadly, moving to the other bed and laying down. His head swirled with thoughts as he slowly started drifting off, finally letting himself drift into a dreamless sleep.
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